Abakobwa burya bagira uburyo bwabo bavugamo ibintu, cyane ko ubusanzwe bazwiho amasoni no kudapfa kwerura buri kintu bashaka kuvuga. Ubu rero ni bumwe mu buryo bwinshi abakobwa bakoresha bashaka kubenga abasore.
1.Ndatekereza ko uri nka musaza wanjye.
Mu gihe umukobwa wifuzaho kuba umukunzi akubwiye gutyo, jya wumva ko yashatse kukumvisha ko atakwishimiye kuburyo wamubera umukunzi. Kukwemerera ko uba nka musaza we ni uburyo bwo kukumvisha ko ibyo gukundana nawe biri kure nk’ukwezi kuko nyine utakundana na mushiki wawe.
2.Ndacyari umwana
N’ubwo tumenyereye ko abasore bashakana n’abakobwa baruta, mu gihe umukobwa wifuzaho umukunzi akubwiye ko akiri muto burya aba yumva umuruta cyane kuburyo nta rukundo rukwiye kuba hagati yanyu ahubwo we aba agufata nk’umugabo umubyaye.
3.Singukunda muri ubwo buryo
Ibi bikunze kuba mugihe wenda umukobwa mwigana cyangwa se mukorana bityo we akagukunda bisanzwe nka mugenzi we. Niba akubwiye gutyo rero ntugashidikanye cyangwa ngo uyoberwe icyo ashatse kuvuga. Burya we aba abona mudakwiranye kuburyo wamubera umukunzi cyangwa se nyine we akaba yumva nta rukundo agufitiye(atakwiyumvamo).
4.Nta gahunda ndafata
Mu gihe usabye umukobwa ko mwakundana akakubwira ko atarafata gahunda yo gukundana burya aba yifitiye abasore benshi akunda kandi batarabivuganaho byeruye ngo afate umwanzuro. Ibi rero bituma yirinda kwica ku wundi kuko aba yumva yazakubwira yego mu gihe azaba yabonye ko ahandi byanze. Mbese ubwo aba asa n’ukwibikiye kuburyo azakwemerera mu gihe ahandi ateganya byanze.
5.Mfite indi nshuti y’umuhungu
Ibi byo nta kubitindaho rwose mu gihe umukobwa afite umukunzi yiyumvamo kandi babanye neza, iyo atagira ingeso mbi yo gutendeka akubwira nyine ko inkweto yabonye iyayo.
6.Sinjya nganira n’abahungu aho nkorera/niga
Nuhura n’uruva gusenya umukobwa akakubwira gutyo nyamuneka jya umugendera kure. Iyo akubwiye gutyo burya aba ashaka kuvuga ko uretse no kuba yagukunda atanashimishwa no kuba hamwe nawe cyangwa kuganira nawe.
7.Ntituri ku rwego rumwe urandenze
Nusaba umukobwa kukubera umukunzi akakubwira ko umurenze jya uhita wumva ko we abona akurenze. Ikiyongera kuri ibi kandi burya aba ashaka kukumvisha ko ushobora kuba wirata/wishyira hejuru kandi atari rwo rwego uriho.
8.Mpugiye ku kazi kanjye/amashuri yanjye
Nk’uko bisanzwe n’ubundi ntihakundana imburamikoro. Mu gihe umukobwa umusabye kukubera umukunzi rero akakubwira gutyo jya wumva neza ko atakubona nk’umusore yaha umwanya cyangwa ngo aguteho igihe cye. Mbese mu kinyabupfura cye aba ashaka kukumvisha ko utamunyuze kuburyo mpapanga iby’urukundo.
9. Ntabwo nzashaka
Nk’uko bisanzwe bizwi, abakobwa hafi ya bose niba atari na bose ahubwo ; bifuza gushaka cyane ko ugumiwe usanga yarabaye iciro ry’imigani. Bityo rero umukobwa nakubwira ko atazashaka jya wumva ko akubona nk’inteshamutwe kandi mudakwiye kubana. Ibi na none bijya bigaragara ku bakobwa bikundira amaraha maze akifuza kwikundanira na buri wese ubishaka ngo akunde agire icyo amukuraho. Binabaho rimwe na rimwe ko umukobwa usanga aryamana n’umusore ariko akamubwira ko atazashaka. Ibi bivuga ko wowe utari umusore abonamo ko wamubera umugabo ubishoboye.
10.Tube inshuti zisanzwe
Mu gihe umukobwa akwereka ko agufitiye amarangamutima ariko akagusaba ko mwakwibera inshuti zisanzwe, burya aba agukunda ariko afite undi umwe cyangwa benshi ; cyane ko bene uwo aba akunda gutendeka. Birashoboka ariko na none ko abikubwira mu rwego rwo kukumvisha ko urukundo yifuza kugukunda ari urusanzwe rwa kivandimwe, ko akubonamo umusore mwiza ariko na none udakwiye kugera ku rugero rwo kumubera umukunzi.
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